| Day |
[Dec. 16th, 2009|12:29 pm] |
Got my Shit together, and made an appointment with the lawyer.... why does everything have to go wrong just when you need it to work for a little bit. Now I am caught up, after fixing the car, and back up to snuff... even got Christmas all but finished.
The paperwork is going well, though the appointment is to make sure I filled everything out right, just to make sure. $200. an hour to proofread my work seems steep, but it is better than the alternative... again. Retainer is being deposited on the 7th of January, and that should take care of it, though i will still be saving like crazy in case anything comes up, like the locals can't find Amanda quickly, or something else just as bad.
Can't wait to finish this.
On a lighter note, Me and Mark got an X-box for each other for Christmas, and a couple games. Assasins creed, because sometimes a little random violence helps after a tough day, Bioshock, because it kicks ass (that and I love pipe dream...) Halo 3, because they didn't have 1 or 2 to go along with it. CoD4: MW, Fun, but made me want to play the new one. Left 4 dead, This one is fun for the whole group, as we can take turns in co-op mode, killing zombies by the thousands, and feeling as though we are working together. and Blue Dragon, because I know Mark would love it.
Overall, today shows me that I can be motivated, and tonight I will be going to see wicked with someone special... Here's to hoping all goes well. |
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| Turkey slaughter day |
[Nov. 27th, 2009|09:29 am] |
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Thanksgiving was great, the best in years.... and I mean A LONG time. And I had to WORK.... That's how good it was. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 3rd, 2009|08:42 am] |
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waiting on info, then the fun begins. hunting has proved pretty good, as I have found half the stuff I need, the other half will be a bit more difficult, and will have to be done on Wednesdays from now until I can get all of it, but the process will be easy enough, once I get the info I am waiting for. |
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| Sickness |
[Oct. 25th, 2009|12:04 am] |
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Everyone around me got super sick, for at least a day..... I am trying my best to postpone that, but I know it is inevidable.... I refuse to be sick until next weekend at the earliest... here's to hoping. |
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| monster |
[Oct. 20th, 2009|09:01 pm] |
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the green eyed monster is back, but i am ready to face him down this time, i have his kryptonite... |
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| Happiness |
[Oct. 15th, 2009|01:09 am] |
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I found a decent lawyer, and one that has a decent reputation. now to find the time when she has hours and I am not working.... I think I can call Friday morning to set up something. Wish me luck. |
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| Thought of the day |
[Oct. 9th, 2009|04:11 am] |
“Our love must not be a thing of words and fine talk. It must be a thing of action and sincerity (1 John 3:18).”
Not Religious, in the popular sense of the word, but I liked the quote.... think on it for a while.
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| Marriage. |
[Sep. 20th, 2009|08:48 am] |
Why does this have to be so difficult. A year and a half I have been waiting for the return of divorce papers, and all I want is to move on with my life, but my credit says I can't get anything done. I just want to move on, accept the losses, take away the fun times, and all of the things I learned. 8 years is a long time to have to recover from, but i am starting to make headway. I want to finish severing the ties that bind me to the old life i lived, and get my life on the track I am hoping to.
Please, just let me live my life. I don't care the cost, and I don't care if i lose you as a friend anymore, I just want to get this finished with. |
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| evil confirmed |
[Sep. 15th, 2009|09:05 pm] |
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I am evil. No doubts about it, I passed. |
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| the monster |
[Sep. 12th, 2009|02:28 am] |
he whispers things to me, making me fear things I know aren't true. He makes me want to stop and do it all myself, and he makes me crazy, but i keep him sated with soothing words, and the attention he craves....
No I don't have any new voices, as long as you have known me, he has been here.... and yes it is getting more difficult with all i have on my mind to keep him sated. but i will, because I don't want to lose all I have worked so hard for. |
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| update |
[Sep. 10th, 2009|08:19 am] |
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Dealing with ALOT of stuff.... Sorry to stiff those of you who aren't part of the stuff, but this will end soon, for the better(probably) or for the worse(slim to none) I appologise for the inconvenience. |
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| The week |
[Aug. 19th, 2009|02:48 pm] |
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I may be evil. I just may be downright evil. |
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| ducks |
[Aug. 13th, 2009|08:07 pm] |
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all my ducks, that still talk to me are lining up, and walking in a V.... now let's see if we can get them to fly.... now to find those lost ducklings, and lead them back to the flock... |
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| Decisions |
[Aug. 11th, 2009|07:42 am] |
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Why must I always make the decision for the best? Why cant once, I make the decision that makes me happy, but screws everything up? Because I am me, I know, but.... Cmon! |
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| this week |
[Jul. 30th, 2009|01:25 am] |
So lets look at the week I have had...
Wed- ... ... ...
ok, so I can't remember.... sue me... I really need to start doing this more often, maybe before I go to bed nightly.... we'll see...
Saturday, i covered for my boss, and promptly learned that when people can get away with something they will. We had a call out, and someone leave because his tenant(who later turned out to be a brother in law) was in the hospital. So 2 down... not too bad right? Explaination: In a kitchen, at least the current kitchen, you have just as many people on as you need to do everything in a day. Good business. But when you have call outs, and no workforce to call on, then you have 4 of 6 people meant to do some 300 meals running around like their asses are on fire. Add on to that that there is only one working brain in the whole of my kitchen, and It is spending all of it's time telling the rest what they should be working on, while making 2 entrees and a decent amount of the sides, and I am getting good at multitasking, let me tell you.
So Saturday sucked.
Sunday, I had 8 cooks on.... so one day 2 down, the next 2 up. Let me explain again. In a kitchen, the only real motivator for dinner is the fact that food HAS GOT TO BE DONE AT A CERTAIN TIME... when you take that away.... aka, you see so many people in the kitchen, they must be getting everything done.... no one without self motivation does anything. And when you have motivation, you hate having to spend your time motivating others, who would just as soon get a lecture, seeing as they get one at least 4 times a day. luckily, motivation is easy when you gather people, and talk to them. Especially if you use one of your weekly yellings to do it. People only listen to yelling when it isn't all they ever hear you do.
So Sunday wasn't as bad.
Monday, everything went smooth, sans a couple key ingredients were out of stock on delivery, but we called the other kitchen and got them sent over. We even got prep done and then some.
So Monday was decently good
Tuesday, I spent from 1045 to 330 grilling burgers on the deck of the place I work, and did very little else, until after work, which was a fun time.
Tuesday rocked.
Today, I slept till 11, throwing off my rhythm, waking to a phone call from a friend who expected a phone call at 9 ish, went and picked him up, got my rejection sticker for my car, so now at least it won't get me a $100 ticket, got a call that the $400 part is in to fix my lights, which will save me another $100 ticket, I helped move pots of hops, which had grown all year into each other's pots, so I spent a good hour untangling vines that feel like glass shards glued to a stick, then an hour at the doctor's office, waiting to hear, that there have been no results back from the tests my friend with the seizure, then went to japanese, and spent $140 for good japanese food, while trying to explain how these complex flavors were good if you would just eat it slowly, and no it is not an all you can eat plate of sushi, and yes that is the portion you get for the money... At least it was good...
Then I came home, only to realize that I left my hat so I drop off my guests to watch the movie, Gone in 60 seconds, without me, as I need to go get my hat. I drove the hour and a half round trip ( have you ever sat down in a cafeteria, then realize you forgot silverware, and do the 15 step walk of shame to go back over and get some.... yeah imagine this as that) to pick up my hat, to come back in to my adopted sister and her boyfriend making out in my brand new bed, while the movie played in the background, and my friend sat aside. Firstly, I think you should know I adopted this girl as my sister, to make sure she stayed safe. The guy skeeves me out to start, but it is her life, so I TRY to stay out of it. Second, my friend doesn't like him either, because he "gets bad vibes, and I can't explain it any better than that" so they were in my room, on my day old bed, making out through the movie. Fine, not my life, but it still puts a strain on my demeanor.
to add a little bit to it, I try to express to another friend that their happiness is my goal, and the connection cuts out in the middle
I have issues going on with people unable to let go, people wanting to move on but can't, people wanting to start, but not knowing how, friends hating each other around me, and me unwilling to pick a side, not to mention my own issues with dating, and the scene thereof
So needless to say i have had a week to raise my hopes, in more ways than one, and a day that has smashed them to pieces in my hands... |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 24th, 2009|01:14 am] |
Rain and rain and rain. brings back bittersweet memories. Beyond that, working, and more working, haven't had too many psych issues recently, so I am actually able to have a social life. wishing I could have thoughts read, and prayers answered... Sometimes I wish it was easier to be Chivalrous.
and to a certain friend.... i do not mean it as chauvanism, I mean it as chivalry. I am to assume chastity, even when I know it is lacking. It is the code, and NOTHING can change that.... it is not meant to belittle or begrudge, just following my own rules, and I am sorry if they offend you. |
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| I guess I will give it a go... |
[Jul. 20th, 2009|12:39 am] |
Using only song names from ONE ARTIST, cleverly answer these questions... Go on give it a go its a laugh.
Pick an artist: Weird Al
Are you male or female: Mr. Popeil
Describe yourself: White & Nerdy
How do you feel about yourself: Why does this always happen to me
Describe where you currently live: Nature trail to hell
If you could go anywhere, where would you go? Albequerque
Current Mood: I can't watch this
Your favorite form of transportation: it's all about the pentiums
Your best friend is: George of the jungle
Your favorite color is: Generic blues
What's the weather like: Christmas at ground Zero
Favorite time of the day: Since you've been gone
If your life was a TV show, what would it be called: Close but no cigar
What is life to you: the saga begins
What is the best advice you have to give: Party at the leper colony
If you could change your name, what would it be: Bob
Your favourite food is: Lasagna
Thought for the Day: You don't love me anymore
How I would like to die: When I was your age
My soul's present condition: This is the life
My motto: Dare to be stupid |
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| Flirting |
[Jul. 18th, 2009|11:32 am] |
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Flirting is far more fun than it should be..... Remind me to do it more often. |
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| Strange, and kinda creepy, makes me feel a bit of the bad kind of perv... |
[Jul. 3rd, 2009|01:46 am] |
Had the strangest feeling all day that i just wanted to reach out and start making out with someone... Not one person in particular, mind you, but I just wanted to do it old school style.
You know, the kind you see in the bad romantic comedy, where the hands automatically go to the back of the other's head, and then you use the force of the curl to try to push their brain out the back of their head, and into your hand with your tongue? The kind where you actually, when you really do it, end up more SLIMING the other person's face than kissing them, where it is a raw need, and not just a want. Where you can taste the flavor of their fluoride treatment, from 6 months ago, that you pull out from a crevice in their teeth? Where if you keep it up too long, you won't have to worry about taking off their clothes, you will just do what you need right here, and they will feel it too...
Yeah.....
on top of that, I am gonna have to work on the fourth, making my days off stand at 4 for the last month, I really am loving the overtime, but I thought exhaustion would make me sleep more... I guess I will mainline caffeine tomorrow, and hope for the best.... early days both fri and sat, so that means long hours, and less sleep, because I won't be able to wind down....
here's to the world becoming what I want it to be.... the one I know it can be, without deluding myself, or making anyone else do anything they don't want to...
"What if everyone said I don't like this and I don't like that?... I guess some people might actually get what the want, huh?" |
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| back home |
[Jun. 27th, 2009|11:01 pm] |
So I returned to the kitchen i was hired for, and found it severely lacking any sort of leadership structure.... there were those who lead, and those who do, and nothing in between... So i stepped up and became the middle manager, for a day.
Now, I know I harp on people for doing other people's job, but I think this will make my job easier in the near future, and give those who work a chance to see what a real kitchen runs like.... I hope those who lead will see what I have done and either become motivated, or step aside so I can do what is Neccesary.
That and I keep going, wondering how long I can keep it up.... Still trying for forever, and still trying to figure out what my morals are screaming about... |
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